


Everything Your Heart Desires

by NotOneLine



Series: Tales of Joy and Sorrow [5]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: AU Added Scene, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Betrayal, Deckerstar - Freeform, Desire, Devil form, Emotional Hurt, Episode S04E09 Save Lucifer, F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:53:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24961120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotOneLine/pseuds/NotOneLine
Summary: When Lucifer's mojo goes crazy, his power to draw out the desires of others is stronger than it has ever been.But how strong, exactly? Strong enough to work on a miracle?
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: Tales of Joy and Sorrow [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1161839
Comments: 40
Kudos: 214





	Everything Your Heart Desires

**Author's Note:**

> Set during Save Lucifer, just after Beth confesses to Chloe.

The temptation was overwhelming. It clawed at his insides, demanding to be set free. He'd come out onto the balcony to get away from her, to hide from the way she looked at him, or more often that not, didn't look at him. Perhaps that was a good thing. The less eye contact, the better. Not with this urge, this _need_ inside him, a need he had to use every ounce of his will power to deny.

The need to _know_.

He sensed her approach before he heard her footsteps, his awareness of her presence always at the forefront of his mind. The metal of the handrail groaned under his grip, and when he felt her reach for him, he flinched, retreating backwards to the safety of the nearby fireplace. Which was a mistake in itself; he could feel the heat dance across his skin, and with it, the light. Light which he knew would highlight the contours of his face, the ravaged remains of what was once a beauty unmatched by any of God's angels.

Her hand dropped to her side, and he wondered if she was just as thankful as he was that she didn't make contact. He didn't want to see what her reaction would be. Pity? Disgust? Or would it just deepen her fear of him further? That, of all things, he couldn't bear.

If only he knew for sure...

He had been right; in the end it was her eyes that did him in. Those blue eyes that haunted his dreams, that gave away so much and so little, all at the same time. Right now, she looked concerned, almost as if she was hurting _for_ him. But how could he be certain of that? How could he trust anything anymore, after he had looked in those eyes and believed a lie, believed it so thoroughly that the truth had almost broken him?

So when she stepped closer, he gave in. Whether she knew it or not, his web had caught her the moment she came out here after him; subtle at first, pulling her nearer, a whisper against her skin that she could trust him, that she could unburden herself, that it would feel so good to just _let go._ Anyone else would have spilled their secrets by now, just like those in the club tonight. But the Detective was different, she always had been. So different she had made the Devil fall again, and this time willingly.

"Chloe…"

The use of her name focused her attention where he wanted it, and as she stared into eyes made of fire and ash, he heard her sharp intake of breath as she finally felt the pull that so many that came before her had.

"...what do you desire?"

For a second, he thought it had failed. For a second, he was relieved. Maybe it was for the best. Maybe he had been wrong, that he would be happier not knowing.

And then the next second came. Her eyes began to glaze over, and she gasped.

"Lucifer, what are you— _Oh._ "

Her mind fought him then. Oh, his strong, brave Detective, how she fought him. But he was undeniable tonight. He hadn't felt this powerful in years, not since the very last day he sat upon his throne. Hellfire flowed through his veins again, and not even a miracle could withstand the spell he wove with it; his natural talents magnified with the energy of the infernal. Her defences crumbled easily before him, the threads of his desires slipping through the cracks, cracks he himself had made over the years.

He'd always made her vulnerable too.

She would never forgive him for this. In truth, he would never forgive himself either. This is wrong, he knows it is. But he couldn't carry on this way, eternally dancing a line between acceptance and rejection. An angel, she called him. An _angel._ Surely tonight had proved otherwise, once and for all. He had hidden this side of himself from her for so long, and now it was all that was left. A side that terrified her.

What did she want from him now? That was the million dollar question. And until now, he had been unable to get the answer. Afraid to even ask the question. Did she want him to stay? To leave? If he remained like this, he would have very little choice in the matter. It was fitting, really, that his own self-hatred should be the thing to send him back to Hell. As it turns out, he was no different to the souls whose guilt gifted them with the same fate.

And so he waited. Waited as her lips parted, as words that should be left unspoken threatened to spill out. For a moment, he wavered, his fear getting the better of him. But the thought of being trapped in this limbo, in this loop of work and friendship and truth and lies… it pushed him forward, and he pushed her in return.

"Tell me…"

She broke, surrendering completely. He closed his eyes and shivered as the rush swept over him, that feeling of the freeing of desire, pure and untainted.

"You."

The shock, the _relief_ that simple word induced in him nearly brought him to his knees. So much so that he almost didn't notice her bring her hand to her face, as she physically tried to stop herself from speaking. There was more, just like there always was. He reached for it, coaxing it out of her with all the mastery of a craftsman practicing his art.

"I want you…"

Another shiver, the echo of every time he had imagined her say those words, in circumstances far different to this. He had never expected to hear them in reality, not from her, not now. And he certainly hadn't expected what came next.

"...to be human."

When the connection broke, she stumbled backwards, horrified. Regret set in immediately, swift and gut-wrenching. But he couldn't bring himself to apologise, not yet. Not when his head was such a mess, the jumble of emotions throwing him off balance, leaving him unable to think straight. The hatred he felt for all that he was, what he did and continued to do, only deepened as her eyes filled with tears, as she turned and left, taking their murderer with her. He wanted to call out, to beg her to stay, but he didn't.

And as he felt the change come over him once more, wings emerging from his back as the last of his skin melted away, he wondered if it was worth it. To have driven her away, once again, all so he could get what he wanted. All so he could know the truth.

Because knowing was more devastating than ignorance had ever been.

For what she wanted, he could never be.


End file.
